Monday, October 22, 2012

Questioning peoples' reactions to Emmi Sue's CKD

It has been three days since Emmi Sue's last appointment and I've noticed her behaving a little bit more like her old self, at least from time to time.  I can't begin to express how happy it makes me to hear my baby purring and purring while she's in my arms, licking my chin, touching my face and staring directly in my eyes as she used to do.  She no longer seems to get spaced out or sit hunched over as she had been doing last week.  Oh, my baby is feeling better, I can feel it!
I will admit that since Emmi Sue was diagnosed with Chronic Kidney Disease (CKD), I have fallen into a bit of a depression, but honestly, who could blame me?  One of my beloved babies is facing a life-threatening illness which will cut her life short, although I am doing everything in my power to not allow it to take her from me too soon.  A day like yesterday was something I needed more than anything as it gave me all kinds of hope and allowed me to smile once again.

Saturday evening I met with my parents, and a few of their friends, for dinner at a restaurant.  The lady who was seated across from me is someone whom I have known for a few years and kind of consider her more than just an acquaintance, but yet am often taken aback by many things she says .  Saturday was no exception.  As most of my parents' friends, she is Catholic, and I feel this makes her feel somehow entitled to "speak her mind" in a way she does not feel I should.  Allow me to elaborate.  When asked how I have been feeling, I explained that I have been extremely overwhelmed and a bit depressed over Emmi Sue, and her response was something to the extent of "death is a part of life."  She then went on to tell me how someone she knew had just put their dog "down" and how they missed him, but did she really feel this was the appropriate thing to say to me at this time?  If Emmi Sue were a human child with kidney disease, would her response been the same?
It sickens me how people assume my babies are just cats, simply because their pets are only animals in their eyes.  I have never treated my girls this way and it insults both me AND my babies when others treat us this way.  They are my family, dammit!  I wish people would be more considerate of how others may feel before saying such things.  I would expect such callous commentary from younger people, but not from a woman who was sitting with her granddaughter.  Had her granddaughter not been there, I would have said something, but then again, I was so completely taken by surprise by what she said, that I may not have reacted at all.  But here I am, still thinking about what she said, so it obviously bothered me quite a bit.


  1. SCREW HER! Oh, sorry, I didn't say that...did I? Well, I'll say 5 Hail Mary's. They are your babies. They have your love and they love you. THAT is family. Catholics, er, sorry, ok, 6 Hail Mary's and a glass of wine (best thing about that religion) are so up tight and rigid in their ideas about what matters. Grrrr Now, excuse me, I have to go throw a football in an end zone (STOP, dirty girl) and hope some steroid pumped man catches it...6 fraking times!

    1. Thanks for the smile and giggles, Diane! I try not to let how others view my "family" get to me but when it's someone I've known for many years, yeah, it stings a bit. Still, fuck that! I know who I am and that is the best Mom to my three babies I can possibly be.

      Now go find that steroid (ugh!) pumped man and pinch his butt for me. :)